In what can only be described as a groundbreaking moment for both the hunting community and Waffle House regulars, an Alabama couple has decided to forego the traditional first dance at their wedding in favor of field-dressing a deer. Shelby J. and Bubba T., proud residents of a small town that’s suspiciously close to a Bass Pro Shop, are doubling down on their love for each other — and the great outdoors — by performing this sacred rite of passage as part of their nuptials.
“We wanted to do something that really represented us,” Shelby said, while sharpening her favorite hunting knife. “Dances are nice and all, but there’s something about gutting a ten-point buck together that just feels more… intimate, you know?”
Their officiant, naturally, will be a camo-clad cousin ordained by an online church that may or may not be headquartered in a bait-and-tackle shop. “Love is patient, love is kind, and love is making sure you don’t nick the liver while field-dressing your prize,” he said, quoting a lesser-known verse from the Outdoorman’s Bible.
As for the reception, the couple has chosen the perfect venue for the occasion: the local Waffle House, where patrons are guaranteed a side of drama with their hashbrowns. “It just made sense,” Bubba explained. “Where else can you celebrate wedded bliss with smothered, covered, and chunked goodness?”
Guests are encouraged to bring their own blaze orange gear and may even be required to participate in the post-dress cleanup, as the couple hopes to turn the event into an instructional demonstration. “It’s not every day you get married,” Shelby said. “But it is every day you need to know how to dress a deer.”
Waffle House employees have reportedly embraced the challenge. “We’ve seen some wild stuff here,” said longtime waitress Carla M., “but I’ve never had to serve a wedding cake shaped like venison jerky before.”
The couple’s unusual wedding plans have sparked widespread support from local hunters and Waffle House enthusiasts alike. “It’s about time somebody did this,” said frequent diner Earl J., nursing his 11th cup of coffee. “I mean, if you ain’t dressing deer at a wedding, is it even legal in Alabama?”
Shelby and Bubba hope their wedding will inspire other couples to think outside the box — or at least outside the dance floor. “We just want people to be themselves on their special day,” Shelby said, brushing off suggestions that this whole thing might be a little much. “If your first date was in a tree stand, why not field-dress a deer at your wedding?”
As the couple heads off into wedded bliss (presumably in a camo-painted truck), they leave behind an important message: True love is about partnership, perseverance, and knowing when it’s time to bust out the gutting knife.
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