In a groundbreaking new study, researchers have confirmed what every visitor to Arizona already knew deep in their sunburned hearts: a staggering 99% of Arizonans will drop the phrase “But it’s a dry heat” into conversation within the first five minutes of meeting someone new. The study, conducted by the Center for Desert Climate Deflection, has been hailed as a watershed moment in meteorological linguistics and the study of climate-coping denial.
Lead researcher Dr. Jamie R. explained the findings: “After surveying thousands of conversations from Scottsdale to Sedona, we found that Arizonans experience a Pavlovian response to any mention of heat. It seems that if the words ‘hot’ or ‘warm’ are even vaguely implied, the average Arizonan is virtually compelled to respond with the phrase, regardless of conversational context. We’ve clocked responses as fast as three seconds. It’s actually remarkable—borderline reflexive.”
According to the study, 73% of Arizonans used the phrase in social gatherings, 87% used it during work conversations, and 100% admitted to deploying it at least once within a doctor’s office, where air conditioning complaints tend to spiral into a series of explanations about desert climate superiority. Participants were so adamant about their weather’s unique brand of dryness that researchers noted an uptick in repetitive strain injuries from Arizonans emphatically waving their hands through the “totally not humid” air to prove their point.
Yet, the scientists caution that the “dry heat” claim, while satisfying for residents, doesn’t necessarily translate to a genuine relief from the staggering, oven-like temperatures that often exceed 110 degrees Fahrenheit. “In our testing environments, we found that even if you put on a sweater, Arizona heat doesn’t magically feel more manageable. It just feels like a personal attack from the sun,” said Dr. R.
One Phoenix resident, Cheryl L., took issue with the findings, stating emphatically, “People just don’t get it. It’s not like Miami or Houston with all that suffocating humidity. Here, the heat just kind of… floats around you. You can breathe it in, like a nice toasty cloud. It’s soothing!” She then casually mentioned, within seconds, that it was 115 degrees yesterday but that “it wasn’t so bad, because, you know—it’s a dry heat.”
The study also highlighted that phrases like “it’s a dry heat” are accompanied by a constellation of other regionalisms, such as, “You get used to it,” “At least there’s no bugs,” and the slightly defiant, “It beats shoveling snow!” These phrases, scientists believe, form an elaborate psychological self-defense mechanism against living in what is effectively a scorched wasteland where metal objects can melt on contact.
Interestingly, Arizonans were also found to exhibit a 76% probability of bringing up their state’s heat as “better than California’s wildfires,” a comparison that psychologists have started calling the “Desert Delusion.” Dr. R. noted, “It’s almost like the state has a collective sense of desert pride, despite—or maybe because of—living in temperatures normally reserved for industrial pizza ovens.”
When asked if the phrase “But it’s a dry heat” could be classified as a coping mechanism, Dr. R. suggested it was more likely a ritual chant, similar to how people in colder climates claim they “love the seasons,” even while scraping ice off their windshields in minus temperatures. “It’s not about truth; it’s about survival,” said Dr. R., “and for Arizonans, that survival apparently involves repeating this mantra until it burns into the minds of everyone they meet.”
As part of the study’s recommendations, the research team suggests that visitors to Arizona should prepare mentally for the inevitable conversation, lest they get caught off guard by the sheer determination of residents to convince them that 115 degrees really isn’t so bad. After all, it’s a dry heat—just ask anyone you meet.
Leave a comment