Month: October 2024
Fast Food Executive Claims: “If We Deep Fry It and Throw Some Cheese on Top, Those Savages Will Eat Anything”
"If we deep fry it and throw some cheese on top, those savages will eat anything," claims fast-food exec with confidence only matched...
Local Woman Confident She’s Only 4-5 Toxic Relationships Away from Finding “The One”
"Sara H., a seasoned veteran of questionable romances, is confident she’s only four or five emotional catastrophes away from her soulmate. 'If I...
Coworker Oblivious to “Damn, That’s Crazy” Cue, Continues Story Like It’s Riveting
"In an astounding feat of social obliviousness, local man Eric S. powered through a mundane story about his weekend drywall repair, despite his...
Your one uncle, the one with the knee that sounds like it’s filled with Rice Krispies, claims he would have “walked it off and kept fighting” after a brutal MMA knockout.
Your uncle with the knee that sounds like Rice Krispies swears he could’ve "walked it off" during an MMA fight knockout. He’s "built...
Teenager Confuses Reddit with Google, Learns Valuable Lesson in Humiliation
Local teen Ryan D. made the tragic mistake of using Reddit as a search engine, leading to hours of insults and absolutely zero...
Breaking NASCAR News: They’re Going Left, Really, Really Fast
"They're going left, and they're doing it really, really fast."
Man Who Bought Three Houses in His Life Feels Qualified to Lecture Banker on Mortgages; Is Completely Wrong
"Local man who’s bought three houses in his life is pretty sure he knows more than his banker about mortgages. He does not."
Man in His 30s Struggles to Answer, “What Did You Do This Weekend?”
“Staring into his coffee, Dave combed through a dim mental slideshow, struggling to recall anything worth mentioning from his weekend aside from TikTok...
Man Stuck in Traffic Aggressively Honks at Car in Front of Him
“It’s like they don’t even care that I’ve got a 5:30 reservation,” Greg fumed, blaring his horn at the driver ahead, hoping to...
Everyone Hates Joe Buck
"Joe Buck has managed to unite sports fans across teams, cities, and rivalries—with everyone hating him equally."
October 10, 2024